So, kids, the way this works is that I'm really cheap and I don't like paying for internet every day. So I only check my email and will only update my blog once a week. However, there will be several entries going up (pretty much about the last week's worth) every time I drag my computer to the café and pay my $4 for an hour of wireless. So. For your greater procrastinating pleasure, you should go back and figure out where my story left off last time. I also threw up some more pictures on some of the older posts.

As it turns out, I didn't actually get to post anything to the blog yesterday because wifi wasn't working. Although, I have a sneaky suspicion that it was actually working at CaféMax, but the lady just didn't want to make any change for me. And I never made it to look for movies. Instead, I bought more minutes for my cell phone, and then decided that I deserved a blin with mushrooms and cream for my hard efforts. Not really, but it was a good excuse. Then I went searching unsuccessfully for wifi. The big success of the day was exchanging the knitting needles.

I'm going to be boring and spend a little bit of time talking about the process of exchanging the knitting needles, because it made me feel awesome about Russia. I spend a lot of time talking about how much everything here sucks and how much I hate it, and not much time talking about the good stuff. Mostly because it doesn't make for entertaining reading or writing, but that's kinda the way it goes. Anyway. So, I went into the shop with my receipts in hand, fully expecting the lady to be like "You want to do what? NO!!!!" so at the very worst, I was just going to have to buy some more needles. But this lady was so helpful and so sweet. I explained that had bought the needles the day before, but they were the wrong ones, and then I got stuck on the word for "double-pointed." This made me feel like just about the biggest idiot ever, because I'd gone and looked at the needles two seconds before so I'd know what the word was. Luckily, she knew exactly what I needed, and even asked me if I needed a different size and was very concerned when she couldn't find ones the same exact size. "Are you sure those are going to be okay? Really?" Yes. Whatever. I'm just making a hat. A half-millimeter size difference isn't really going to make that much of a difference. But it's sweet of you to care. So she let me exchange the needles with absolutely no fuss. It was amazing.

I went to Phoebe's house last night for a Love Actually party. This was expected to be a rather small gathering of kids with some beer and wine, and Love Actually in Russian until everybody got sick of it and wanted to switch to English. It turned into a rather large party, with over half the group--maybe twelve of us--jammed into Phoebe's tiny kitchen with people not being allowed up to the apartment unless they had booze with them. I managed to drink all three sizes of Heiniken last night, along with a gin&tonic in a can. I've been very curious about the gin&tonic in a can phenomenon since I arrived, because it sounds like one of the most vile ideas ever. Contrary to expectation, that was some pretty tasty booze. I'm sure they use the type of gin that makes you blind if you drink it straight, but they mix it up with so much lime that it tastes like you're drinking gin and Sprite. Mmm, mmm, good!

I also learned that sending drunk people out to buy more booze is pretty much not a good idea. Or rather, sending me out drunk to buy more booze is not a good idea. Because, really, I like to drink. I like to drink a lot. I like drinking really really a lot, and when I'm drunk, I want a lot of booze. Anyway, I bought more booze than I should have and ended up drinking all of it. Which was pretty amazing going down, but I'm hurting this morning. And I really really miss PBR. As gross as that is, I really do. I would break somebody's leg for a PBR. Although I got to go to the grocery store in the basement of the mall with the gun kiosk just inside the door. Would you like a semi-automatic assault rifle with your bread and cheese, sir? We got it all right here!

Hey, Rob! Guess what else I saw at the store last night! BACON FLAVORED CHEETOES.

Anyway, I really wanted to take a shower today, but apparently it's just not in the cards. The gas water heater won't light, and I'm afraid of blowing myself up if I try to light it too many times. I guess I'll just be gross a little while longer.

I've been doing really well with the whole not smoking thing, although the last week has been really tough. I watched this great little movie called Manga about a young and confused low-life dude with a crush on a model and what happens after he climbs in her bedroom window. It was a fun movie, but everyone smoked all the way through, and I've never wanted a cigarette so bad in my life. After that, I've been walking really close behind all the smokers I can find.

I want to go to the internet café, but I have hives on my mouth and I look stupid. I've only had hives one other time since I got here, but I've got them now. But only around my mouth and on my lips. This makes me look like a really demented and much less attractive Angelina Jolie, because usually only one side of my lip will swell up. I'm dirty and I have ridiculously poofy lips. Life is fan-tastic.